3/23/2025

Hi everyone!  Thank you for all the kind words and thoughts sent my direction.  Thanks to those local and nonlocal who sent energy during the recent procedure.   Calm hands and good emotions are important when someone is poking around in your heart.   It was seen and felt!

I am going to have to change tact in my work.   Ride share driving is becoming more and more unfeasible, as net fares decline with the operators taking more for themselves and shareholders.  I could get higher fares if I had a larger vehicle that sat more people and was newer, but then I have higher costs too.  So I am considering what I can do, one is write, the other is technical work or possibly computer coding.  AI is going change demand for programmers which much of the mundane work being doing by AI, and its surprisingly capable in that way.  Large language model AIs are good with computer languages, that shouldn't be too surprising.  What they are not good with is the art of it all, so there will always be niches for certain skills.   I fear there will be too much reliance on AI, as sometimes what it says and does is complete nonsense.   It's an infant technology.   There are flaws.

Someone offered me a bitcoin mining machine a few years ago, I sometimes kick myself for not taking him up on that.  Hindsight is always 20/20.   I still think the whole crypto thing is a bit of a passive aggressive take on replacing the Federal Reserve notes.  Why not get rid of the Federal Reserve instead? And go back to an asset based currency?  And you don't have to have the internet to move it around. 

I do have a book I need to finish for Xerxes, Denice made kind of a deal with Xerxes and I volunteered to get it all down in text and on the Internet.  I haven't finished my part of it yet, although it is on Substack.  I need to publish it on Amazon or similar outlet too.  Admittedly I kept a low profile with it given Xerxes history with Persia and the Biden admin's war mongering with Iran.   But it's the kid of message even the Mullahs in Iran wouldn't like it anymore than the Rabbis in Jerusalem.   I do believe Xerxes has come back, in a new body, with a completely contrite heart about his mistakes so long ago that sent Persia on a wrong track which affects it to this day.  There's kind of a rule of thumb in the universe, if you mess something up, you get to come back and fix it.  I don't expect to make money from it, it's more at this stage keeping my word on the small book.  But there are other things I could make money writing about. 

My plan with the blog is keep writing at least until I do meet my friends in person.   After that, everyone will be having similar experiences and its purpose would be completed.    If you can help out with the blog it'd be greatly appreciated.   I'd like to raise $800 or more for the end of the month.  Particular need is paying some utility bills and I need a replacement rack and pinion hydraulic system for my car, mine is leaking.  A used one would be adequate as long as it doesn't leak.   I have given over 8000 rides since December 2017.  Austin's potholes and speed bumps have not been kind to suspension components, next on the list after the rack and pinion is new struts.   It's been a good car and very reliable but everything physical wears out eventually, even our bodies.  

I love you all!

Terran

Update 3/232025

Meditating at a waterfall in the Italian Alps in 2015

Update

3/23/2025

Thursday morning I went through a heart catherization procedure.  I was calm but my blood pressure indicated my inner tension about a procedure new to me.  The staff was good and quite humorous, and even the cardiologist seemed in very good spirits (the nurses were talking about that among themselves).  There were several curtain stalls, one of which I changed into a hospital gown and laid in a bed.  They installed one IV line, and two artery tubes (for a lack of a better medical term).   I remember saying to Source, "Okay lets heal this thing, lets astound the doctor! Okay?"  I got these images of red fluid swirling about briefly.  Anyway you can think of that as my command or prayer if you will, for those of you who consider Source/God to be external.

I was then wheeled, bed and all, down a long hallway to the "cath lab".   Basically it's a bunch of an equipment hung off some rails in the ceiling with a lot of swivels.  There's a table they called "the ironing board" (I'm sure that a highly technical term) and a swiveling x-ray machine that can make full motion X-rays.  And then there's this 50 inch TV screen to my left.    

They wheeled the hospital bed up close, then jacked it up until I was level with the ironing board then slid me onto it.  And of course it's about 50 degrees F.  The technician did the finally preparation for the catheters, injected some local anesthesia into two of my right arm arteries, one was to measure flow rates, and the other a probe.  I thought it was a camera but it seemed to be just a way to inject x-ray contrast dye as the actual viewing was by X-ray .   Going in I had known my valves were fine.  But there was a chance the vessels were blocked and would need a stent, so I was nervous.  But even that would be better than landing in the hospital every 6-12 months.   I wanted to be out cold because I don't like watching things go in my arms, but they said they could only take the edge off.  I opted out of fentanyl because it gives me really bad dreams, but they used a little bit of something else and I was fully awake.  When the doctor arrived he put the catheter in and moved up the artery.  I thought it might be hurt but it did not, more a sense of pulling and tugging, apparently there's no nerves in the arteries themselves.   

Before long he was at my heart, and to my left about 2 feet away was this 50 inch TV screen.  There was my heart the size of a dinner plate right before my eyes.  I could see the contrast die being injected and watch it disperse through the vessels and heart.  No doubt recorded and analyzed by software within the machine.   It was actually fascinating.   My doctor said "You have perfect arteries, you don't need a stent".   I breathed a sigh of relief!  And then he finished the procedure and the technician wrapped up the procedure and removed the catheters.  Then I thought "what the heck is causing the problem then?"

I still don't know.  Could be this energy transition on this planet and my 1956 model heart is doing its best to keep up?   I don't like chalking it up to "just old age" as it's been proven time and again everything can be changed, even with simple excercise and diet. 

So the doctors want me to take some pills,  the ones they really want I can't afford.  I might be able to get those at low cost from Novartis's foundation but they want my complete financial records and I am not inclined to give that to a company raping money from the infirmed and then using a foundation to get a tax deduction when they give it away for less than $750 a month.  You know those pills cost them less than $20, because they sell them for that in Mexico and Canada.  It's always Americans who get charged the big money.  It's just the principle of it all.  I hope RFK Jr can bring some sanity to drug pricing, but we will see. 

I am not a great believer in pills as they always come at some other bodily cost.  Its the whole reductionist way doctors work, its not so much systems analysis of the body complex, but more akin to a hacker of computer software getting one specific thing to happen in a computer but possibly messing up the operating system for everything else.  But sometimes you have to make tradeoffs to stay alive long enough to find out what really is the problem.  If Morocco was any indication regular exercise will help a lot if my knees can tolerate it.  There could be some toxin, or some other factor?  I don't know.   

The woman Uber driver that gave me a ride home Saturday also has the same issue, as did her father and grandfather in Turkey.   I was told my next younger brother has the issue too.   And he did not have septicemia in 2009. 

I know my dad had it after he was exposed to some toxic pain fumes while spraying a car with new urethane paint from DuPont, which landed him in hospital with a pneumonia like condition from the isocyanate paint catalyst.  When those paints first came out there was no warnings, no protective suit clothing like they have now.   So there may be a tendency in the genetics towards this condition.  I don't know but I don't believe DNA is destiny either and there is so much latent healing potential in every human if we know how to access it (and I am no expert in that regard).  

I'll be chasing down stats and treatments on AI engines for the next few weeks.  Drives doctors nuts sometimes you just don't accept everything they say as god given gospel.  My cardiologist is unique as he kind of enjoys intelligent questions. 

My oxygen lasts night was not high, but it rose during the night.  Not sure the reason for that, sometimes there are good days and bad days.   I had been running at 95-96% saturation before the procedure.  Could be just dealing with eliminating the toxins of everything that was done.   

I am still here, and I take some comfort in knowing the vessels and valves are okay.  I still don't know why the heart is stiffer than it should be, but the answer will come.   

Thank you for being here!

Austin somewhere under Hwy 183A 

I found this dream in my note file, it's worth repeating.  Perceptions of harm whether from individuals, groups or nations, can be attachment to anger and victimization.  I don't want to live my life that way.

Terran.

I had a dream. I was living in Japan and a man carelessly crashed into my car. I was very angry at the man for the damage he caused. I wanted to damage him.

In this region of Japan there was an honor custom. Before you could take any action against a man, whether bodily or in a court of law, you had to carve a representation of the situation and a chain to it out of a single block of wood and present it to the person who wronged you before taking whatever action was on your mind.

If you did not do this, your friends and family would consider whatever action you took next dishonorable.

This custom made no proscription against whatever action you took, but you had to carve the situation from a single block of wood including the links in the chain. There was no requirement that the carving had to be a good one or even artistic. Just the best you do with your hands.

I don’t know if such a custom actually exists in Japan. Perhaps it once did in one of Samurai lives I’ve had and this is a memory returning? I really don’t know. Source takes us through lives that polish our being. We don’t always understand the why of it during the life. I’m not really a believer in karma.

There is an aspect of my nature that has roots in Bushido. The warrior culture of the Samurai. Ganesha recognized it in me, mainly the actions I did not take during the churn of events in the last days of Morocco. He told me it’s why he invited me to the Italian Alps to stay with them in their Chalet. Ganesha has that aspect too. Ganesha is a zen sea of calm.

So I decided to create a representation of the man’s car with 3 or 4 wooden chain links attached to it. I got a block of brown hard wood and sketched the rough outline of what I’d have to carve away. I was allowed whatever woodworking tools I needed, whether power or hand tools. If I in any way broke the chain while carving it, I had to start over. The chain symbolized the attachment the event has to the person.

I was industrious and had the beginnings of a rough outline in the car in no time. Woodworking is my thing. But the chain is difficult, for you must sketch in such a way to allow enough room for the space between links to be carved into individual links. I used a Dremel tool for much of it.

As I carved and the days wore on, my anger dissipated into the wood. I began to see things in my own nature, my impatience at how long this carving took. My frustration with this honor tradition of carving a block of wood and my anger for the vehicle and man who drove it. Which was the whole point of the exercise. The custom created a space of time for an individual to cool off and to see themselves.

By the time I finished the carving I saw the man for what he really was. I saw the event for what it was. But more importantly I saw myself and my emotions about it all for what it really was. By the time I presented the carving to the man I simply bowed to the man and left.

ここにいてくれてありがとう

Koko ni ite kurete arigatō

Grok: The phrase "ここにいてくれてありがとう" is Japanese and translates to "Thank you for being here" in English. It's a warm, appreciative expression, often used to convey gratitude for someone's presence or support.

 

Update1: March 20, 2025 Update

3/21/2025

I thought I'd catch you up on what is going on here. I am feeling much better than I was, although when the energies are high inbound to Earth I am in need of extra rest.  I got a laundry list of pills they wanted me to take, but I am only taking what is strictly necessary.  The body is complicated thing and I try to keep things simple without the side effects from every pill they want to sell me and their interactions with each other.   One Rx was a jaw dropper, they wanted $750 a month for it, but with my medicare prescription insurance it's only $378 a month.  Like I can afford that?  That's a car payment!   Big Pharma preys on the vulnerable. 

I've bounced in and out of hospitals the last 3 years, I probably should have gone in late December but I didn't want to use the same Medicare part B insurance company that approved and then took away my doctor proscribed BIPAP machine (a fancy CPAP machine).   Plus the hospitalization last August was absolutely frightening.  I will never go back that particular hospital ever again. Picture a hospital run by Beetlejuice and you might come close to the experience I had there after being sedated in a dark room for 3 days with no food or water.  I am not so certain it was malice but more incompetence and lack of accountability.  That staff was 90% "traveling nurses" (contractors) as they couldn't keep normal staff.  I am not going to name that hospital, they have deeper pockets than I do when it comes to lawyers.  

The hospital  I went to a couple of weeks ago was a very competent although smaller facility.  And I was in and out about 5 days faster.  I had a chat with one nurse that had worked in the place I went to last summer, she said "that place is weird, it's a cult".   And she might be right about that, but I had assumed the staff was partaking in their own pills after midnight.  Whatever the case, I did not feel safe there.

I didn't exactly say what was going on with my health the last 3 years, part of that was a concern I had after last summer's experience.  But now where I sense we were in the Universal Cleanup of the corruption in this country, things feel much more positive.  We have a real change in government in the United States that is shaking up things.  Some in a good way, and other ways some puzzling agendas that I don't quite comprehend.   Greenland for example. 

We create our own reality, as each of us is Source in the flesh, with our own unique periscopes on what is taking place around us that we call reality.  I'd like to live at least long enough to see this world flip into the abundance it was always meant to have.  I mean really that's why I am here, why Heather is here, and why most of you are here at this time.   We each do our part, whatever that may be.  Sometimes it's simply being there to do what needs to be done when nobody else can do it.  And we each have our own unique skills and lifetimes of experience.

I decided I am not going to live in fear of what someone might do if they knew my health history.  Most of my extended family thinks I am a bit nuts, but most of you know what that is like.  My youngest brother has humbled and astounded me with his kindness.   He's a really good guy.  He wasn't able to be here this time, he's dealing with the health issues of his mother and father-in-law at this time. 

Some of you who follow this blog really helped me during these moments, even though I haven't been able to write as much as I would have liked (plus I lost my good reading glasses). I thought I just lay on the line what is going on.   Know this, the last thing I enjoy doing is being in the hospital.  I don't want sympathy, but I could use any good energy (or if you pray - the effect is the same) you'd like to send towards healing and resolving this problem. 

In 2008 I came down with blisters on my legs, I consulted with 4 different San Diego doctors trying to get a diagnosis on what these thin clear blisters were on my lower calves.  None of the doctors gave me a diagnosis or what to do about it.  I think I got them from walking in seawater at the beach, and it could have been polluted dairy farm runoff as that is known to happen.  Plus there are innumerable biotech firms in La Jolla and who knows what they do with their waste products?  Still the origin of it was a mystery.  

I was relayed a message from British Intelligence in 2014 that it was the Chinese who targeted me with a DNA specific pathogen (which pre-COVID sounded ludicrous-but now completely possible).    Which seems like an odd thing to be told unless they had one of those timeline viewing devices, long rumored to be in the hands of the US Military.   If we have them, then the Chinese do too, as they have been dealing with ETs longer than the US has.   I hadn't begun to blog yet, I was following the banking system, and markets as I knew something was wrong about it.  Obama lied about the "TARP funds" ostensibly a 3/4 trillion dollar mortgage bailout that was gobbled up by the bankers.  I hadn't met Heather yet nor had seen her law filings on the central banking systems. The Andromedans also said much the same in 2015.   But I can prove none of that.  Nor am I holding any grudge because of these allegations.  I have no proof, and it's not the only time somebody has tried to kill me. I just find it pointless to mention those episodes as I know I will be here as long as it suits Creator of All.  I've had an NDE and I know only love awaits after this life.  But I'd rather not go just yet.  Plus I only get more powerful if they do something that stupid and release me from my limitations.  I do smile when light workers talk about their own death threats, and think "welcome to the club!".   Fear is a tool of control, if you let it. 

The pathogen in the blisters eventually got into my blood stream after a few months and by January 2009 I was in septicemia and turning purple from lack of oxygen.   The diagnosis was MRSA, but I am not sure it was ever truly cultured and proven to be that. There was a slight recurrence a year later and they could not culture it, but they did treat it at home with a self-infuser of vancomycin. A friend in Morocco also had MRSA from her time as a medic in a Thai refugee camp, but hers looked completely different, small red blisters, and she still got occasional out breaks.  I do not get outbreaks anymore. 

My ex-wife did not issue a DNR, that we had talked about should I be kept alive by machines, which I am ever so grateful.  The head of ICU said I would not survive. She said "oh yes he will survive!"  She came one evening with a friend of hers that worked as a secretary for Lee Carroll, the famed channeler of Kryon. She brought along her mother who claimed to channel Isis. When her mother looked at the head of my bed she said "OMG there's a huge angel at the head of his bed!"   The first time I met that woman (I've forgotten her name) was when she rang my doorbell for Nancy and I opened the door and it was like a flashbulb went off in my face, with whatever energy was with that lady.  I didn't fit the puzzle pieces together until later as to why I had that perception.  Isis knows my frequency. 

Anyway, I had a cytokine storm from the purported MRSA,  that was clogging my kidneys with proteins, pneumonia, and a cold sore I had on my front of my nostril took up residence in my trachea. I was on antivirals and vancomycin and I looked a right mess. I was hanging on by a thread.  Then I had the Near Death Experience which forever changed my outlook on life on this planet.   I am not unique in having an NDE, Heather told me she had 2 of them in her life when she was younger.   So have many other people but a lot of people don't talk about it for fear of being ridiculed. 

I was told in 2009 I had had congestive heart failure.  I didn't really know what that meant, except that it wasn't a heart attack. I had enough other issues going wrong to be too concerned with that, I thought it was a temporary thing that would go away once I got better, but they did prescribe mostly the same meds I get prescribed now.   After 30 days in ICU I had to relearn how to walk, in a rehab sub acute center, and within month I was walking with a walker a mile a day.  I set myself a goal to go to Machu Picchu in 4 years, which honestly was unrealistic at 14,000 feet, but at least it got me working on my body and building my coordination and fine motor skills back up in my legs.  I enrolled in a health club in Carlsbad that was run by a local hospital and all the staff were trained physical therapists.  They got me on a routine of weight workouts to build my legs and glut muscles back up.  I felt pretty good at sea level.  But when we took my daughter to college in Flagstaff at 7,600 my heart had a time getting enough oxygen and it physically hurt, and I realized I wouldn't be going to Machu Picchu any time soon.   Later trips to Flagstaff were not as much of a problem but I had to pace myself.  I was getting stronger. 

When I went to Morocco I was completely on foot or in taxis or buses.  There is no building code in Morocco as to standard step sizes and rises.  Steps in Morocco force you to be conscious of where you put your feet.  The villa Caleb had rented was on the beach so I did a lot of walking in sand to get food from the market in town.   That combination of walking and unusual stairs was very good for me. I got stronger and eventually didn't need my CHF pills at all (as my heart got stronger).  I actually grew an 1.5 inches (3.8 cm) height in Morocco and my shoe size went from a  US 10 to 11.5.  When I was invited to the Italian Alps I was living at 5,600 feet and hiking the mountain trails. I got in very good shape by the time I returned to Texas.   I continued to walk in the US every day, especially when I was in DC filing court papers for Heather and collecting court transcripts.   But when COVID happened and every thing was locked down and people would scream at you for walking outside without  a mask on I got out of the habit and I think that may be part of the current problem. 

Soon I will be going in for an out patient heart catheter procedure.  Basically they run a scope up an artery in my arm and take snap shots of the inside of my heart.  There's a small possibility I may need a stent installed to open up a blood vessel but it's not common in congestive heart failure cases.  My heart valves are good, there were able to tell that much from the recent sonograms.  My heart doesn't image well on sonogram, my rib cage doesn't give them a clear view. I am told the procedure takes an hour (possibly longer if I need a stent installed) I will be under general anesthesia and won't be able to go home until that wears off.  I may have to spend one night in the hospital.  There is always risk in this kind of things, but I feel calm about what is coming up shortly.   I would prefer to use an "med bed" healing chamber on the Andromedan ship Horizon.  It's a medical facility as well as an expeditionary ship.  But that option is not currently available.   So I have to do what I can with what's available to ride out the interim.  As crude as our medical systems are, they are pretty good with some procedures.

I was told my late mother returned to her Andromedan form, as did my older sister.  It'd be nice to see both again.  They will look different, but certain traits of personality always come through.  It's kind of amazing to realize how much planning went into all of us being her at this time and how small a circle of friends it is from life to life in physical forms.  I've been very fortunate to have access to some knowledge ahead of time, but everyone will soon have that kind of access to information. 

I give you all my heart felt thanks for the support you've shown me over the years.  I don't know how I can ever return the kindness you have all shown me.    Perhaps just have to be a big party someday?  However that flows.

I love you all!

Terran 

I am home

I was released from the hospital Saturday afternoon.  Feeling much better.  I went to a smaller hospital, which had a really good crew.   The staff seemed to like working there. 

There's one outpatient test that I may do yet, that will at least rule out one possible cause of this issue I have been dealing with since 2022.  

PS: I was told by the doctor on the way out of the hospital to stop use of  insulin. My blood sugar is now stable.  I didn't take a lot of insulin, just a pen dose once a night.   In 2022 high blood sugar sent me to the hospital, and the nurses told me then they were seeing diabetes emerging among people who had COVID 19.  I came down with COVID before it had a name.  Felt like a very bad flu, that lingered with fatigue for months.  The blood sugar issue seems to be healed.   I didn't expect the blood sugar news, but it's welcome and one less expense.  They told me to continue to monitor it. 

Thank you all for your kind messages!

I love you all! 

Connection is protection

March 3, 2025

Communication is key to the healthy functioning of complex systems.   There are many forms of communication, verbal, tonal (music and word emotion), chemical communication such as hormones, ion exchange of nerve fibers, and pheromones being a short list of common ones.

Much has been made of AI recently as it’s a powerful technology, but it’s actually an analog computing model emulated in a digital environment.  Analog computers existed before ENIAC and subsequent digital computers which IBM dominated for decades, then Intel and recently Apple. Analog computers were crude AI, but worked great for solving process problems like refining oil or chemical engineering.  Early echo cancelation on ATT long distance telephone lines used a one neuron AI. 

Analog computers fell out of favor until neuro research matured and researchers began to figure out the mechanics of a brain and how it worked and it was mostly about a vast interconnected network of connections to other nerve cells. The magic sauce was the connection and how the brain cell weighted the connections from other nerves.  Early neural nets were circuit boards with op amps. These were arranged in layers from back to front and interconnected.  One early researcher created a circuit to recognize text (OCR) and it was good at it. Further experiments created a circuit that could disambiguate words that were similar in sound or spelling.  Then one day a researcher decided to see what happened if he took some wire clippers and cut some of the wires.  What he got was a model of dyslexia. 

Modern AI use different functions for different AI functionality, this and the weighting of the inputs is what they mean when they say “algorithms” but it’s not like a digital computer software, you can’t go to a single location for a single piece of data. It’s spread over the entire network kind of like a hologram. They’re not easy to debug. It’s usually retrained on new inputs.

I lived in England from 1988-1990.  I was watching a TV discussion about the bureaucratic abuse of security classifications to hide mistake.  One of the panelists made the comment “Our enemies already know our secrets, the classification is done so the citizens don’t know.”   That always stuck with me, and D.O.G.E.  has certainly proved the truth of that in recent weeks with the US Government.  Much corruption,fraud and fuckery has been hidden under classification and bureaucratic obfuscation.  And nothing works as it should.

When a persons brain is compartmentalized, we call that a dissociated personality.  Corporations and governments are just collections of people.  They can become disassociated too. 

People are meant to communicate across all notions of synthetic persona (corporations). It makes it hard to hide fraud and crime in general. Decades ago department heads had secretaries and women are natural communicators.  Now we have email and word processing software.  AI has the potential to make it worse. Our corporations are more unethical than ever.  Human onnections were cut.  

Security classifications do much the same. After Roswell (perhaps before - my father was a P38 pilot and witnessed UFOs over Germany) the military realized they had an issue for which they had no easy answer and no nuke was going to fix it. Hostile ETs (and friendly ones) were a fact.  So they did the only thing they could given the choices the President made.  They created deep dark well of black projects in the hope they would learn more and have some sort of way to deal with it all later.  And now those 60+ years of secrecy evolved into two branches, mainstream military physics. And it’s been hugely expensive in money and lives.  They are at a quandary just telling what they really know. 

Tech not released is such a huge colloidal waste of money.  

Elon Musk purports disbelief in ETs being present now.  But I suspect he’s in an awkward spot in that his security oaths pretty much require him to deny such knowledge.   Or maybe he really is outside the loop.  But a zero point energy device would sure be a great feature for a Tesla!

We don’t have healthy people, families, relationships, corporations or government and that has to change.  

I’m not a California Liberal but I don’t hate them either. We all want a life that’s not sucking us dry of money, privacy or freedom.  We need to focus on the commonality, at least with those open reason and who have open hearts.

Baron Trump on what will be revealed